Before school started I was working on two novels I’ve been working on for a while, probably over a year. I finished the rough drafts of both of them. Once that was done, I had that empty feeling I always get when I don’t have a story on the go. One night a few weeks ago, an opening line popped in my head (which is kind of how I start all my books) and I jotted a few things down. Now I’m in the thick of it, getting to know these new characters and finding out about them.

It is the BEST feeling. I’m writing and my mind is racing, trying to figure out what’s going to happen, why these characters are at this point in their lives and getting ideas of where I want them to go. When I’m not writing, I’m thinking about them, imagining the next scene in my head. I just want to dump all my ideas on to the page.

I’m working on another teen story. I really liked my first one (even though it needs a lot of work) so I wanted to try again. It’s in third person, about two teens who go to a performing arts school and how they fall in love. I’m very early in, but I really like my characters. If I don’t, I usually don’t finish the story.

Recently, I read “On Writing” by Stephen King, a book that I’ve been meaning to pick up for a while. I absolutely loved it because we write in the exact same way. King says don’t worry about plot, or outline every little detail of your story, focus on the characters and just write. He says he writes a rough draft in about a month, because he gets to the point where he can’t stop writing and needs to get everything down quickly. I do the same thing. I’ll never forget when I wrote my favourite novel with my favourite characters, I was in a state and finished that rough draft in 2 months.

Not saying that I write as good as Stephen King, but it freaked me out that pretty much all his suggestions about fiction, I’ve done naturally. I write like a maniac, my stories are character driven and once I finish my first draft, then I go back and change things around.

This is not a good state to be in when I should be focusing on school. And I am focusing on school! But since I was 10 years old, I’ve focused on school and had a story on the side to work on in my free time. It’s what feels right.

Sometimes this passion feels like a curse.

However, I stayed up and watched the premiere on Tuesday, just so I could write a blog and critique it. While the show has improved in some areas, the premiere was still pretty wack.

I was on Twitter that night, and one of the main criticisms was the absence of Kelly Pitts. Last season, she was in only a handful of episodes and the writers turned her character around completely. Now she’s gone for good, without an explanation. It doesn’t seem like anyone in the cast is talking about why Brittany Daniel left the show, if it was her choice or if she was fired, but the show isn’t the same without her. Some of my favorite scenes from previous seasons were Melanie, Tasha and Kelly talking about men and drinking wine. That female bonding was gone from the premiere, and probably won’t be around for a while because Tasha and Melanie hate each other.

The episode focused on Melanie/Derwin, Tasha/Malik and Jason. I’m going to ignore the Tasha and Malik storyline completely because it made no sense and I really don’t care what happens to either character.

I thought the Melanie and Derwin story was stupid. It was dumb that Derwin was so mad that Melanie had an abortion, even though it wasn’t his baby. I hated how weak Melanie was, begging him to love her and forgive her. Was she always this weak? Tia did a good job though, she really carries this show.

I have so many problems with the Jason Pitts storyline. In previous seasons, it never seemed like he had an issue with being black and black women. When he was with Stacey Dash at the end of season three, it was no big deal. Now all of a sudden, he married Kelly, and doesn’t date black women because of these issues that he’s had since he was a kid. Completely inconsistent and sort of stereotypical. And Brandy’s character was definitely the “angry black woman” stereotype. The two of them had no chemistry at all.

Besides the stupid storylines, I did think the writing improved. The scene with Melanie pleading with Derwin to just say he loved her, though it was weak, it was nicely written. It also looked like BET has pumped way more money in to the show. Those outdoor, on location, steady cam shots are not cheap. At some points it looked like a movie.

Yes, I will keep watching this season. I’m hooked, and invested in these stupid characters, but I probably won’t write about it.

What did you guys think? Has The Game improved or not?

And for the past two years, I’ve been real comfortable. Since I graduated university in 2009, I’ve been trying to figure out what to do with this life. I’ve applied to countless jobs, bombed more job interviews than I can count, worked my crappy part-time job in the mornings and wrote fiction for the rest of the day. It was painful, miserable, boring and lonely, but it was what I knew and it was safe. I was free to go on a few trips, and hit the gym every morning causing me to now be in the best shape I’ve ever been in my life. But I couldn’t keep living that life any more. So I’m making a change.

I’m going back to school.

It’s something I vowed I’d never do, because I’ve always hated school, but I’m desperate for a change. I need to learn more skills to get me the kind of job that will get me out of this city and to New York City. I’m so afraid about this change, I’m having nightmares. It will be an adjustment to be back in a classroom, having homework and essays to write. No more goofing around, having naps in the middle of the day. It’s time to focus, make some real moves and do some real work so I can have the future I want. It’s time to do something with my life.

The posts on the blog may slow down, but definitely won’t stop completely. 2012 is the year of change. I just hope it s a change for the better.

This was also the most successful year for this little blog of mine. From writing reviews of popular concerts from artists like Chris Brown, Janet Jackson and Jay-Z and Kanye, wondering why Britney can’t dance anymore and meeting Les Twins, I got more love and more hits than ever before.

I went through a lot personally. I went through a screwed up relationship, met amazing people on vacation and got a new job that toughened me up. I learned a lot and will take it with me in to 2012, because there are huge changes on deck for the new year. I’m definitely ready for new challenges, but I’m scared to death.

Music was kind of a disappointment. For the first time in my life, I couldn’t bare to listen to the radio in the car. This trend of house music as pop music annoys the hell out of me. R&B seems like it’s dead. I probably listened to more old school Toni Braxton and Bobby Brown than anything new. My favorite album hands down was 4 by Beyonce. It’s classic, I’ll probably be playing it for the rest of my life. I loved Frank Ocean’s nostalgia/ultra mixtape. I’m proud to say I was a Frank Ocean fan before Watch The Throne came out. I became a huge Childish Gambino fan, thanks to becoming obsessed with Community. After finally seeing him live, I know that I will always and forever love Chris Brown. If I had to choose my favorite song of the year, it would probably be “Promise” by Romeo Santos and Usher. I was starting to think that Usher was losing it and getting old. But it was really adventerous of him to do a Bachata song and get back to his soulful roots. Romeo Santos is my crush of 2011. That brotha is just…

Every show that I really loved this year is either cancelled or in jeopardy. Community has been put on hiatus until the summer. Fringe ratings have been dropping and after years and years, All My Children aired it’s last episode. How To Make It In America, after having it’s best season ever, has been cancelled. I won’t say anything else about that. It still hurts.

When I came home from Punta Cana, I read a lot of fiction about both sides of the island of Hispaniola and learned a lot. As usual I always had a book on the go, and I read a lot of interesting stuff that’s outside of what I normally read. I just hope I can keep that up in 2012.

I can’t say anything bad about 2011. I’m healthy, everyone I love is healthy. I went through disappointments and struggles and came out stronger. That’s all I can ask for.

These past few weeks, I’ve got nothing.

It’s the holidays, formally known as Christmas time, and like every year, I’m busy. Working retail, Christmas is the best time to make some major cash, cause the stores are so busy. I’ve picked up another job for Christmas, so now I’m hustling from job to job, with barely any time to eat or sleep, let alone write.

It’s kind of miserable. I hate this time of year, I have for the past ten years since my Grandma passed away. I should probably get over it, but she loved this time of year and always made it really special. It’s not the same without her. It’s also hard because I just want to relax, since I’m going back to school in January and my life will get even more hectic.

It it too much to ask to just chill at home and watch A Different World reruns?

But I’m not complaining. My life has been stalled for the past two years nad going back to school will be a nice change. I’ll still blog, hopefully still write my fiction and read cool books.

I’ll probably be back near the end of the month, talking about my favorite books, TV and music from the past year.

Until then, I’m just going to focus on getting through each day.

It’s been called the best hip hop concert ever. I’d read reviews where nothing negative was said, which is pretty rare for a hip hop concert. I missed work so I could buy the tickets in August, and they were not cheap. After hearing the reviews, I was expecting a great show. We went to the second of two shows in Toronto. We heard that the show didn’t start until after nine, so we didn’t rush to get there. Our seats were amazing, we were on the second level, right near the second of two huge cubes Jay and Kanye performed on.

Jay-Z

The show started early, and what a beginning. Jay-Z was on the cube in front of us, Kanye was near the stage, and they started with “H.A.M.” We were blown away that we were so close to Jay, I’m sure he could see us. I was screaming my head off, so excited to see two of the greatest rappers ever on one stage.

I’ve been trying to think of how I can put in to words how amazing the show was, and I’m finding it very difficult. All I can say is that it was a non stop, two hour, party. Usually when you go to a concert, even if it’s your favorite artist, there’s always a break, when the artist does a few slow jams, or runs off to quick change. That’s when you could sit down, take a breather, catch your breath. This did not happen in this show. Either Jay and Kanye were both on the stage, or one of them was on the stage doing his solo hits. It was hit, after hit, after hit, after hit. By the middle of the show, I was losing steam. I couldn’t even rap along with them, while Jay and Kanye rapped every single word with no hype men. To be able to do that show every night takes incredible stamina.

With two rising cubes they rapped on, which showed HD images of animals and other things, fire balls, fire shooting up from the floor, it was visually stunning as well. What I liked the most were the lasers. Even though I was dancing so hard, most of the time I missed them, they were pretty cool.

Kanye West

The energy in the arena was insane. When the lights would go up, I’d just look around and see thousands of people with their diamonds in the air, waving their arms at the same time. It’s an incredible sight, proof of the power of music to unite all different types of people.

For me, the most fun part of the night was “Ni**a’s in Paris.” I had read reviews saying that they performed the song more than once, I heard they did it four times during the show the night before. I wasn’t prepared for the madness that came along with that song. After performing it twice, Kanye and Jay stood still, surveying the crowd, seeing if they really wanted to hear it again. We were going crazy. Kanye said something about turning the arena in to a club, instructing everyone to stand on their chairs and get crazy. I’ve heard different numbers from different people, but it seems like our show got “Paris” 5 or 6 times. I read on Twitter they did it 7 times in Detroit this weekend, a record. I walked out of that arena covered in sweat, tired, sore, with ringing ears and barely a voice, but I was blissfully happy. I wanted to go back in and do it all over again. It was an experience I will never ever forget.

I don’t usually go to hip hop concerts because I don’t expect to see a spectacular show or performance. Watch The Throne Tour changed the perception of what a hip hop show can be. It was my first time seeing Jay-Z in concert, and he has amazing stage presence. He’s the complete opposite of Kanye, who’s wilder and a lot more emotional in his performance. Plus, only Kanye could perform wearing a leather skirt and still look sexy. This was my third time seeing Kanye in concert, and he was at his best. He’s probably one of the greatest hip hop performers of all time.

This show was an amazing end to a year of seeing so many concerts. But this one tops them all. Seeing Jay and Kanye on tour together was a once in a lifetime event. I was with my favorite people and it’s a night we’ll always remember.

Oprah’s life class – Her show ended in May and already Oprah is back on TV everyday, now with her Life Class. It’s a one hour show, on her network OWN, where she just talks to the audience about a lesson she’s learned while hosting the Oprah Winfrey Show for twenty-five years. It’s simple things she talks about, learning to forgive, believing in yourself, letting go of past anger, but it’s things that people, especially me, need to be reminded of. Since watching the show and the webcasts online, I’ve noticed a change in my attitude. I’m more positive, I don’t let things bother me as much, I look forward to the future and things to come. This time last month, I was thinking only negative things, feeling really down about my life. I don’t tune in to Oprah’s show every night, but when I do, it instantly makes me feel better and makes me think.

Island Beneath the Sea – This historical fiction novel by Isabelle Allende grabbed me from the start and did not let go. It focuses on Tete, a biracial slave who lives in Haiti during the battle for its independence. I didn’t know much about Haiti’s history, and this book gave me a lot of great information. I love reading about slavery, and this book focused on slavery in the Caribbean which is something I wasn’t too familiar with. I’m not a huge historical fiction fan, but this novel was epic.

Community timeline episode – I’ve been seeing a lot of tweets lately saying that Community has fallen off in the third season. I would have to disagree based on the episode that aired a few weeks ago where the study group visited Troy and Abed’s new apartment. Six different timelines played out depending on which study group member when downstairs to get the pizza. It sounds complicated and weird, but it was brilliant and super funny. It’s still one of my favorite shows on TV.

Zumba – I think a good Zumba class depends on your instructor. I’m very particular about the kind of Zumba I like. I like a class that’s focused on Latin movement and music, I want to salsa, not do the running man. My gym added a new Zumba class and I’m back to being addicted. The instructor is amazing and the music is so good. I even went through a short phase where I was convinced I’d be the best Zumba instructor in the city. That phase has thankfully passed. It’s fun to brush up on my Latin dancing for when I go back to Punta Cana next summer.

One of my complaints about this new season is that it’s too plot driven. Last season, episodes were more character driven. My favorite episode from season one was Rachel’s birthday and the boys took Kappo to Avenue. Nothing plot wise happened in that episode, it was just about this super cool crew hanging out. This season, it’s all about the various plots. Ben and Cam trying to get Crisp off the ground, Cam trying to get with Lulu, Domingo and Rachel’s new romance, Rene trying to hype up Rasta Monsta and now Kappo dealing with the law. There’s a lot packed in to thirty minutes now.

The storyline that I’m enjoying the most is Rene’s. Rasta Monsta was one of the biggest storylines in season one, and now that Ben and Cam are doing other things, it’s just Rene and his team. I love his new girlfriend, Debbie,  who brings out a different side to him. It will be interesting to see what happens to him, now that he’s leaning more towards the criminal side. I also really like Rachel and Domingo together. It’s a weird couple, they bonded over weed, but I like them together. Rachel is stressed out and Domingo is chill. It works. But this week Ben found out and he was not happy about it.

I have to say, Ben has become such a douchebag this season. I used to love him, and now he’s so… arrogant. He acts like he’s the main guy behind Crisp and just seems to be feeling himself a little too much. Same with Cam, who is trying so damn hard to get with Lulu. Who is this Lulu chick and why does he like her so much? I mean, it’s cute to see him flirt and try to come up to win this girl but who is she? Where did she come from? How does she know the whole crew? Maybe I’m hating on the girl because I love Cam, but I don’t see the chemistry between them.

Like I said before, I think I’m way too in to this show. I need to take a step back and realize it’s just a show, they’re not real people and it may not last beyond this season. There are still four more episodes to go, and considering that out of the first four, I only didn’t like one episode, it’s still my favorite show. I just need to tone down my obsession.

This was my very first Cirque show. I’d heard from so many people who have seen other shows that I would be blown away. I knew to expect lots of dancing and acrobats and gymnastics, but I didn’t expect that I’d have so much fun as well. The whole energy of the show was completely different from what I’m used to. The crowd was a mix of people, and they were there to see a show, not party like I did at the Chris Brown concert. So I stayed in my seat for the whole show and was expected to clap politely and sit still. But it was impossible when every single Michael Jackson hit is blasting at super loud levels and the dancers on the stage are dancing like crazy. I was the girl bouncing in my seat, squealing and clapping way too loud.

The two and a half hour show probably had some sort of complicated storyline, but I didn’t really follow it. There was a figure in all white, who I think represented Michael. He would show up from time to time, there was a point when a dancer in a monkey suit, probably representing Bubbles the chimp, appeared and they were best friends. There were also a group of five guys (two of which were Les Twins) who seemed to be Michael fans and performed some Jackson Five songs. The story didn’t really matter to me. It was about the music and dance.

I don’t want to give too much away, but there were so many moments I caught myself watching the show with my mouth hanging open. There were so many things going on, so many places to look to make sure you didn’t miss anything. There were people suspended in the air, a pole dancer who could split her legs in crazy formations, a live band and background singers, and even a dancer who had one leg and used crutches. Some parts of the show were breathtakingly beautiful, other parts were sad, but it was all about Michael. There were audio clips of his voice, images of him as a child, singing with his brothers, and moments where he was singing with no music in the background, reminding me what an amazing voice he had.

It was the same songs everyone has heard a million times, but they were remixed, giving them a new feel. There were elements of the show that were taken from ‘This is It’ like the footage from ‘Earth Song’ and ‘They Don’t Care About Us.’ All of the iconic choreography remained the same, and I could definitely appreciate that. Laurent from Les Twins had a solo during ‘Beat It’ that almost had me jump out of my seat. It was amazing to see those guys dance live. At some points it felt like I was watching a dance show instead of a circus. Dance was the major element of this show and rightfully so since Michael was all about dance.

During the spectacular finale, I looked around at the sold out crowd and realized that even though Michael is physically gone, he will never be forgotten. His music, dance and legacy will live on forever. Definitely check out this show when it comes to a city near you.

So after the show, my sister and I started walking to the subway, but she knew that I wanted to try to meet Les Twins. Twice before, after concerts, we’ve waited around after the show and were able to meet dancers. She figured it wouldn’t hurt to try, especially since we had no idea when we’d ever get the chance to meet them again. So we walked back, found the busses and waited.

It paid off, because they came out and we got to talk to them. I must say they were so incredibly NICE. They talked to us like we were old friends and seemed genuinely humbled when I told them that I came to the show just to see them. They told us about dancing for Beyonce, what they thought about Canada and how long they’re going to be doing the show. Walking away, my sister and I were freaking out, but because they guys were so chill and extremely friendly, it didn’t feel like we met celebrities.

It was an amazing night. I hoped I’d get to meet Les Twins, but I didn’t want to get my hopes up. Thanks to my wonderful sister, I can say I met them. Good things happen if you believe!

When the video was released yesterday afternoon, Twitter went crazy. I’ve never seen so many positive reactions for a video, especially a Rihanna video. Even I had to say that I enjoyed it, even though I can’t stand the song.

It’s like a mini movie. Watching it reminded me of the days when the video to a song was so important, millions would go in to making sure it was on point. I can appreciate that Rihanna is one of those artists who puts a lot of time and effort in to her videos. The song “We Found Love” isn’t really about anything, while the video has some pretty deep messages.

It shows the downward spiral of an all-consuming, obsessive, destructive, drug filled love. Her love interest in the video (who many are calling a “Chris Brown lookalike”, even though he looks NOTHING like Breezy) is played by model Dudley O’Shaughnessy. He’s an interesting looking dude, but he’s cute. Their relationship starts off innocent, but once drugs enter the picture, things start to go downhill.

You see the two of them stealing, fighting with each other, living in a messy room just having sex and doing drugs. It’s like they shut out the whole world and became completely wrapped up in each other. They were in love, but at the same time looked miserable.

The most chilling scene was the two of them fighting in the car. It was pretty controversial for Rihanna to put that in the video, knowing that she experienced something like that which ended up much worse. The whole video could be a reference to her relationship with Chris Brown. She’s said in interviews that they were best friends and were very much in love. Obviously some of that love was destructive. What was interesting was at the end of the video, she left him on the floor of their dirty room and walked out the door. The message hopefully being that she was sick of the relationship and needed to get out.

The visuals are interesting, she wears a lot of cool clothes and has different looks. I saw a few tweets comparing her to Madonna. One thing about Rihanna is that she’s constantly reinventing herself. She went from being the island girl from Barbados singing reggae influenced music, to cutting her hair short, singing pop/R&B, to being edgy and tough and now she’s an international pop star. I may not like the music, but I can’t hate on a 23-year-old black girl ruling the music world right now.

Check out the video here.